“Write something on confidence”
– A request after my last blog
Growing up in a catholic family, Sunday catechism was a compulsion and I loved going because I would be spending time with friends also it wasn’t like regular school. But one thing freaked me out the most when it was my classes turn to read during mass. I prayed that the teacher wouldn’t give me to read and hence I would try to hide or talk as less as possible so that she doesn’t see me. On Sundays when I was not as lucky to escape her sight there’s nothing I could do. I had to get up there and do what was assigned to me. Now I wasn’t bad at reading or something, but it was that practice read that I dreaded. No matter how confident how I was, my body always betrayed me. Till today I can’t think of a time when I read in front of the class and I didn’t shiver like an 8.9 magnitude earthquake had just occurred below my feet. Trust me when I say this, I literally struggled to hold the paper. This thing traumatised me to such an extent that every time I performed a task in front of a crowd, I felt as if everyone was watching me and judging me, even though it wasn’t the case, in fact people didn’t even bother. I would so love to go back to my younger self and tell him, ‘It’s OK, don’t get so worked up over this, people don’t care what you’re doing.’ The quote, ‘Step out of your comfort zone’ has become such a cliché cause it’s very much true and trust me when I say this it does make a huge difference in your life. Unlike a tree requiring favourable conditions to grow, humans mature/grow the more they’re in uncomfortable situations.
Don’t be burdened by fear.
My uncomfortable moment came in the form of what I considered a mistake back then but now it was the blessing I can’t stop thanking for. Being young and not much of a thinker, I said yes in an instance when my Mom asked whether I would be comfortable going to a different state for study purposes. That’s where the story begins, although I had my mom’s family where I was to move for some weird reason I was alone and to top it all off there was this language barrier for the first 6 months I was there and being introverted I ended up coiling up even more. But as I started getting past the language barrier, contrary to how I had lived up until then I started opening up. I wasn’t afraid anymore, because I felt the people I’m spending time with were temporary, that I wouldn’t have to face them for a lifetime that after I was done with studies I would be going back home. That’s the message I want to give you’ll through this blog. Often times the fear of criticism, of facing people paralyses most of us but if we focus on the fact that once this is over people won’t even remember it or that even if they would it won’t last forever. People in today’s day and age don’t care if you messed up cause their attention doesn’t last a lifetime. Even if you made a mistake or are afraid what’s the harm in trying. Writing blogs isn’t something that I was born with but I know for sure if I continued no matter what, that I will get better at it and eventually be the best. Why do I say this? Cause I firmly believe that your confidence is directly correlated to how often you find yourself in uncomfortable situations or how often are you willing to step outside your comfort zone.
Go outside and face your fears.
There’s this story I’d like to share with you’ll which is an epitome of how beneficial stepping outside your comfort zone really is. The story goes something like this,
It had been well over 9 months since my joining, I along with most of colleagues then had made ourselves quite comfortable with the project we’re working on. Then one fine day, our manager comes and tells us that the decision makers had decided to move the project to another location and we had an option to move along with the project. Although the project was comfortable and if we took our expertise there we would be given good responsibility there, only two agreed to move along with the project and rest decided to stay back with their friends. The people who stayed behind were to be divided among projects in our current location. This one project no one wanted to be a part of because it was a nightmare to many of them already working for it. Then came the day we were to be assigned projects for which were to work going forward and much like the scene in 3 idiots where students are bribing god to get marks, we prayed to god so that we won’t be assigned that dreaded project. A couple them weren’t as lucky as they were but it didn’t bother them expect for one particular colleague of mine. She ended up crying, pleading to the manager to move her to some different project but the manager didn’t have none of it. He showed the belief in her that she should’ve done. Long story short, it’ll be two years this November for this colleague of mine and she is now the EOP (End of Process) which basically means that she approves other peoples work before it goes ahead.
Who knows what would’ve happened if the manager had given in to her pleading? Would she be where she is now? Would her confidence have grown? Would she have stepped out of comfort zone ever? I very much doubt it. But none of that happened, it wasn’t her choice, it was the managers decision and belief that he put in her that she is where she is today.
Only when a baby dares to try over and over again despite the falls does it learn to stand and eventually walk.
So, if at all you come across your fear make sure you believe in yourself while facing it and be ready for growth beyond what you thought possible. Be ready to STEP OUTSIDE YOUR COMFORT ZONE.